The Suitcase Chronicles

On a big hiatus...

...Because I can't frickin' access Vox from work and even if I could I wouldn't be able to upload or post anything - because the firewall sucks. 

So in the meantime, I'm just keeping this blog open, but I won't be updating it for a while. I think. I've made two new blogs, one for my students, and one personal. Feel free to email me for the addresses. I will only give them to certain people. 

It's about time I open up a new blog anyway... because I'm no longer using that suitcase.

I guess it's not my year after all then.

A great turn of events have occured since I last posted. It's only been the third month and already I feel as if I'm losing my ground. I find myself just trying to busy myself so as not to have time to mope around longing for my life back in the UK. In all honesty I still have trouble adjusting to the lack of freedom that I have. Apparently I can't even have a little space to let out my frustration.

I am beginning to feel sick of the stares and smirks that people address me just because I enter the staffroom.

Oh yes. In case you haven't known, I work now. And I hate my job. I really do. It's not just because of disagreeing work colleagues, but also because it takes up most of my free time. And it's very rareI to find colleagues who think positive. It's very depressing. I just wish that the environment could be friendlier. I mean, the first question people ask me here is "Who's kid are you??"... Why is it important for them to know who my parents are? For goodness sake, we are living in the new Millennium. Why does the question of lineage still matter?

I have nowhere to go to relax, unless I see my friends. But even if I have that option, I can't see them everyday. And when I do see them, I can't seem to let my emotions, my cries, my anger go - not like I used to when I was younger. I am having trouble letting it all out. Have I really changed this much?  

I still wonder at times: Is God punishing me for being less faithful?

 

Don't get me wrong. I haven't given up on life. But it's very suffering.

 

It's going to be my year...

Because I am 2010.

If you're asking me what my new resolutions are... to be honest, I haven't really figured them out. Well, at least not until this second. Since everyone's wishing for a Happy 2010, I guess I could ask to be happy too!

I suppose I could stick to my life's to-do list in which one of the objectives is to lose 2 stone. Yeah... right. I don't know if I'll be able to do that but I think I really should - because it's frickin' hot down here and all this winter fat isn't helping.

Maybe I could learn to be more tolerant, but at the same time, more stern when it comes to reacting against unpleasant behaviour. I am going to be a teacher after all - and I might even have a permanent job as one, if I don't get to do a PhD this/next year. I still haven't decided, because to be honest, I haven't finished my Masters dissertation yet. Ooh... that's a good resolution - to finish my Masters dissertation. 

This will be my first New Years Eve since 2005, so I'm hoping it'll be awesome.

Well, I think that is all I'd like to say for now.

HAPPY 2010

My first December outside Wales...since 2004

It has been a while since I've lived in Brunei during the holidays; but I believe I can get used to this kind of life. The first thing I don't have to worry about is rent. And I am definitely enjoying being with my family and friends. Things have been going pretty good, though I am at times tempted to splurge on a ticket back to Wales. I can't deny that I miss my boyfriend... who wouldn't miss their boyfriend when they're that far apart? But I'm being positive here - keeping myself busy; and making life enjoyable here while it lasts... 

You can c heck out the photos if you want (by clicking on the images below) I've been:

Seeing the sights...

random december 2009

Playing with my siblings (and having fun with their hair!)..

familydecember2009

Hanging out with the bimboes....

Babes December 2009

...And generally having fun with random stuff. I'm still contemplating what to do on New Years' Eve... Maybe I'll try sleeping this time, and dream about my last trip to London with Jay, wandering around the Winter Wonderland... *sigh* I miss that guy.

London December 2009

Da bo chi Cymru! *sniff*

It's been a while since I've had such a busy weekend. Every day something new to pack or buy... or receive. I've finished packing up all of my essentials now and have been counting up the kilos (of my checked baggage, mind you :P) and going shopping for travel-sized bottles, vac-seal bags and some bits and bobs so basically I'm all set for my trip to London tomorrow. 

Last Friday I went to the Community farm again - though it rained all day I still had an awesome time. I fed the animals this time and boy were they happy to see me... and the little paper bag of treats in my hand. Rabbits and Guinea pigs/hamsters are so adorable; and their fur is soooo soft...  Sheep and goats are very greedy... But they are so cute it's really difficult to tell them off. I fed a cow too - she licked my hand and oh my goodness that tickled me to bits! There was slobber everywhere! I had to stop there and then, because I couldn't stop laughing from the tickling. I really enjoyed myself. Click on the photo below to look at more pictures at the farm:

Community Farm 2

During the evening I decorated a door plaque for Naomi's horse, Ruby. She really loved my design... I did too - funnily enough... it was the first time I'd done something like that. I don't know if I did good... I think I did... For a beginner anyway. I should put these pictures in my CV:

Ruby Stuff

The next day I went to Cardiff again to pick up a hard-case for my guitar and to make an exchange on one of my previous purchases. I received quite a lot of presents that day and I must say I did feel very indulged... The first gift, or should I say gifts; since they were given together, were a retro Space Hopper and a Swatch from Nana, then Jay bought me a Sony DCR-SX30 in Cardiff and later that night I received a book from Naomi! Aww... thank you so much! I really don't know how I can repay you for all this...

And as if all of that wasn't enough... we also had a meal at Tenkaichi... my favourite place in Cardiff... Ahh the good times.... 

The Last Supper

I am leaving tomorrow and I don't know if I'm ever coming back again to study here in the UK but I do know this: this country will always have a special place in my heart. 

I haven't finished my work yet...

..But I can leave the country now... My personal tutor went through the first two chapters of my second draft and she was pleased with the improvements however she suggested that I finish the rest of the work in Brunei because she doesn't want me to rush the dissertation... I wouldn't want to either, seeing that I actually work better under calmer situations (I don't really know many people who can work under pressure, really). 

So I spent the last week, after seeing my lecturer, shopping for presents for my family and all the essentials before going back home. Yesterday I spent the whole day in Cardiff with my boyfriend Jay; we went inside St. David's 2; that place is HUGE, well... huge for Cardiff anyway... and it so reminded me of the BullRing - Hey Mel! I found something that my little sister asked me to give; and two things I think my brother would like. The place was pretty busy.... including Borders, which was closing down. A shame really, I liked that place. Well to be honest, I didn't shop for much... And I don't think it would've been good for me to buy so much either - mostly because my suitcase is already quite full (even after pulling up the extension bit). 

Which reminds me... what should I do with this blog if I don't get to study in the UK anymore? Should I change the name? Or should I just leave it as it is and make a new one? I haven't really decided yet. It's always good to try something new - but then again, I'm a nostalgic type who likes to cling to old memories. Happy memories though.

Never mind... I'll come up with a decision soon  (and yes... I can hear you snickering Mel :P)

Slow and Steady... wins the race?

I usually get irritated that I can never do things at a fast pace. (except maybe in cooking; because I might end up burning the food if I cook too slow - plus, who the hell would like to eat overcooked veggies?) But this time, I'm actually quite happy that I'm taking my time to do the dissertation... The deadline is October next year after all... I have plenty of time, though realistically I'd like to finish it before the first week of December so that I can have one less thing to worry about before I go home.

The thing is, I can actually see how much of a difference I'm making in my work by not being so pressurised by time. The quality is so much better... when the essay isn't rushed. I am glad my work turned out to be like this - and I hope it can actually impress my lecturers this time. Yet again, I hope I am able to finish it by December.

I believe I can do it. Yes. I will do it.

Sparkle! Sparkle! The Aaaamuleeettt.....

Okay, so I'm not going to include another Charlie the Unicorn video in this post; but I will include some sparkly photos. James, Jay and I went up the mountain earlier this evening to launch some fireworks and play with some sparklers to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night. It was very very cold outside, silly me for just going out in my BDSSW jumper... should've put something warmer on.
 

Sometimes I get scared that the sparks would come and get me

Bonfire Night 2009

My wish has been fulfilled

Visit to the Greenmeadow Community Farm (27 October 2009)

I no longer have to worry about leaving Wales with regret. Click on the above photo to access my new photo album - my visit to the farm yesterday :)

I am 23. Yay.

Jay was going to take me to the Community Farm today but it was raining. I'm kind of disappointed because I was really really REALLY looking forward to petting some sheep. But I suppose we could always visit the farm another day. Plus, I'd feel a guilty dragging my  boyfriend into celebrating my birthday when really I should be doing my work and with the funeral coming soon, I shouldn't be begging to be the centre of attention. I don't want to be selfish.

My Facebook wall is full of birthday greetings though, so I'm glad that people remembered, at least. I do know that Facebook displays reminders but even if they only remembered just then, at least they didn't hesitate to greet me. And it is refreshing that my family made an effort to call me this time, instead of it having to be the other way round.

I didn't get anything that I wanted from my wishlist, but to be honest I'm not in a materialistic mood today so it doesn't matter *grins*. Plus, I'll be going home soon so they're just things that I wouldn't mind bringing back home despite the limited space I have in my suitcase. Or in my freight space, for that matter - I can only use up to 40 cubic feet of space and with the stuff I've collected over 4 years, that might just be enough for the stuff that I have now and nothing more.

Anyhoo... I think I'll have a nice birthday rest now. I'm going shopping tomorrow... For family gifts. Don't even think about scolding me!